CHANGE OF LIFE - Chapter 7

I had a restless night. The other women in my room seemed nice but I still was afraid that someone would steal my money. I don’t question that I did the right thing in leaving Willard. It is just that I am in a position now with so many unknowns. There are so many things to fear. The first priority has to be to find someplace to live. Without an address I can’t look for a job. Without an address I can’t open a bank account. Without an address I can’t buy the Chicago Plus rail and bus pass which gives unlimited rides for a month. I can only buy a Chicago Pass and each ride is deducted from the amount deposited on the card. Without an address I can’t even register the Chicago Pass. If I lose it, anyone can use it.

In the morning, sharing the bathroom and showers with seven other women was a real circus. I took my empty suitcase out to the luggage storage on the way to breakfast. Breakfast at the Hostel was generous. All of the guests were friendly. I sat with another woman my age named Ouida. Ouida was from Nebraska. When I asked her where she was traveling and what she wanted to see, she said,

“I lived for forty-five years in the same farm community in Nebraska. There were no more than a hundred people that I saw all my life. I married a boy who lived on the farm down the road. We had a happy life together, raised two children, worked hard, loved each other more every year. Last year Fred was trying to clear a jam in the manure spreader. It grabbed him and pulled him into it. Then somehow the tractor kicked into gear. Someone in a neighboring field saw his tractor and the manure spreader going round and round in the field. He ran over and saw what had happened. There wasn’t much left of Fred.

“I cried and cried for days on end. Then I was in a daze for months. My kids would come and ask me what I was going to do about the farm. I guess I just gave them a blank stare. Neither of them is interested in being a farmer. Finally, just before spring I decided to sell the farm. I divided the sale price into thirds – one third for each of our children, one third for me. I had a mover come and put our things in storage. Now I’m going to see America. I went to Mount Rushmore, the Mall of America, now Chicago. From here I’m going to Niagara Falls, then Boston, and Maine. I don’t know where I’ll go to from there. If I find a place I like, I will settle down there. I’m never going back to Nebraska.”

I wiped the tears from my eyes. What a horrible experience Ouida had been through. I wished that I could travel to all those places. No, I don’t. My purpose is to prove to myself that I can support myself. From there, I want

to prove to myself that I have worth as a human being. If I had, in truth, been a “fat sow who stayed home watching television”, those days are ended.

After breakfast, I went out into the busy Chicago streets. The first place I went was to a large drugstore. I found one near the Hostel. I purchased a TracFone for $29.95 and bought a 200 minutes/90 days card for $39.95. While there I bought a couple pairs of pantyhose and a small bottle of shampoo.

Back at the hostel I went on the Internet for directions to the Chicago Transit Authority, and from there to Clifton Street and Armitage Avenue. While in the lounge at Union Station, I had searched for Polish bakeries knowing that these would lead me to the Polish neighborhoods. I grew up in a Polish neighborhood in Baltimore. My maiden name is the same as a Polish hero of the Second World War. I never knew my father. He walked out on my mother before I was born. I thought that in a Polish neighborhood I might find a room for rent.

I walked to the Library and went into the subway station for the Pink Line. I took the train going to 54/Cermak and got off at the Clinton-Green station.  From there it was about a block to the Chicago Transit Authority headquarters. I was directed to the second floor and there I bought a Transit Pass. I deposited a hundred dollars on the card.

Going back to the subway station, I took the Pink Line to the Loop and got off at Clark/Lake station. There I took the Brown Line going toward Kimball and got off at the Armitage station.

Riding on the trains, I was still worrying about how I could secure my money. I can’t be carrying a pocketbook all the time. I can’t open a bank account without an address. Then I glanced down at my dress. Both of my dresses have pockets. I will put most of the money in the two pockets and sew them closed. I’ll just leave out what I expect to spend that day. I can easily take out the stitches when I change dresses.

When I disembarked from the el and walked down to street level, the neighborhood I saw was very much like the old neighborhoods in Baltimore. I walked down the street for several blocks, hoping to see a ROOMS FOR RENT sign. I knew that I was in a Polish neighborhood. In many of the store windows was a sign for Zywiec beer. Through the windows of the houses could be seen pictures of Pope John Paul II, President John F. Kennedy, and the Black Madonna of Czestochowa.

I was tired, thirsty, and hungry when I came upon a neighborhood café. I went inside, sat down, and was soon facing the woman who ran the café.

“What can I get you to drink, Sweetie?  A beer, ice tea, coffee?”

“I’ll have an iced tea, please. Do you have hard rolls and cream cheese?  If so, that is what I would like to eat.”

“I have hard rolls and cream cheese, but how about a pirogi filled with berries and topped with sour cream.”

“Oh, that sounds so good, yes, bring me that instead.”

When the lady returned with my iced tea and the pirogi, I said,

“This neighborhood reminds me of my childhood. I grew up in a Polish neighborhood in Baltimore. My maiden name is Kosciuszko. This brings back a lot of happy memories.”

“What brings you to this neighborhood, Sweetie?”

“I’ve come to Chicago to start a new life. I’m looking for a room to rent. I was hoping that I would see a sign in one of the windows ‘Room For Rent.'”

“You say that you are starting a new life. Did you just get out of prison?”

Dolores laughed. “My husband and I broke up. I couldn’t bear to remain in that little town in Arkansas where we were living. I decided to go to Chicago to begin my new life. I need to find a place to live, first thing. I can’t apply for a job or anything else until I have an address.”

Just then a customer came in. She patted me on the shoulder, “I’ll ask around. If you haven’t found anything by then, come back in to see me Monday morning about 10:00 AM. That will be between the breakfast and lunch crowds.”

“Thank you.”

I had a leisurely late lunch. I left a generous tip at the table, went to the restroom, and then paid for my lunch on the way out.

“I’ll ask around for you, Sweetie.”

I continued to walk along Armitage Street, then walked over a block and came down the street parallel to it. I saw a sign “Rooms For Rent” and my heart leaped. I walked up to the door and knocked. It was answered by a women whose clothes were dirty, her hair was in disarray. Dogs were yapping all around her. The air coming from the house was foul. I said, “I’m sorry I must have the wrong address. “ I left rapidly.

I hadn’t even considered the fact that the rooms for rent might be in dirty homes, that there might be dogs and cats roaming the house, or that the residents of the house might not be desirable people to live with.

I hurried on down the street for several blocks until I saw the elevated line. I turned right and followed it back to the station at Armitage Street. Now I have to take the Brown line going back to the Loop. From there I take the Pink Line back to the Library and walk back to the Hostel. Along the way, I looked for a store where I could buy needles, thread, and scissors.

Back at the Hostel I gratefully lay down on the bed to rest. I realized that I would soon go to sleep lying there. I had to go out again and buy a few groceries at the store for supper tonight and for some meals during the weekend. I bought some hard rolls, a package of fruit cups, cream cheese, a can of deviled ham, and a small can of tuna fish. I also bought a box of seven single serve packets of instant coffee and a sampler box of herbal tea bags.

When I returned to the Hostel, I prepared a simple meal of hard roll with cream cheese, fruit cup, and coffee. The cream cheese and fruit cups I put in the refrigerator. The remaining items I left in the grocery bag with my name written on it on a shelf in the kitchen.

Looking at the bulletin board, I saw that there would be a walking tour tomorrow. I decided to go.